Hello🌻

I have two teenage children (actually one is not quite but almost a teenager), and communicating with them can be a real challenge. They are moody & grumpy💢 It is so annoying, really.

I don’t know how a wise mother deal with this problem, but for me food & massage can be a real saviour😉 There are some dishes that my children really love so that can get them to smile. The only problem is that I can’t keep feeding them the same thing or I don’t always have the time to cook.

What alway woks is giving them a massage though☀️ Just a simple 5 minutes head or hand massage or even foot massage as long as they had a good bath & don’t smell. I love getting a massage myself, so I started giving my children a quick massage once in a while when they were about 9-10 years old. I call it a massage, but it basically is just rubbing with a bit of pressure, nothing professional.

My children love it💖 On average, I give them a massage once a week. I offer it to them right before they go to bed. They always always say “yes!” to that no matter how grumpy or tired they are, and it is such a great way to communicate with them. We sometimes talk or we don’t but it really doesn’t matter. I can tell that they are so relaxed and happy by the end of it.

I’m so glad that I started doing it when they are a bit younger so that they don’t feel weird about their mum touching their head, feet etc. It is quite natural for them. It is great especially for my daughter as her study pressure has increased this year, and I feel like I have a tool to help her rather than to annoy her all the time💦 I’m not sure if my son will still let me touch his head in 1-2 years time, but I intend to keep going as long as he is happy.

Trying have a conversation with a teenager is hard, so don’t bother, just give them a quick massage🌈 They might give you a smile at the end.

My happy samurai life in London💫

Hinata

I love them. I really do!!

Even when they are grumpy, moody, banging their doors on me & leaving the house in a mess…. seriously?? give me a break!!

I count the number of years until they go off to university – I end up feeling even more desperate. I will die before that.

I look at my phone… my home screen has a photo of when my daughter was 7 & my son 4. They look so sweet

I remember “first 5 years of life, a child can give his/her parents whole life worth of happiness”

This is what we say in Japan (in a very positive way, of course, meaning that they can give you sooooo much happiness). In many ways, I agree with that.

If this is true, then it is not too bad. They did give me a lot of happiness for the first 5 years (actually until they became teenagers). Even now, they do give me some happiness (yest they do! when they feel like it)

So I guess it is ok. Japanese old saying must be right, so my case is not too bad💦

Putting a old photo of your children for your phone home screen is very effective. Many of my friends have more recent photos, but I really do not see the point of that. You see them everyday, surely you must remember how they look?

Anyway, that is how I cope and I am still ticking along.

My samurai life in London✨

Hinata Kasuga

Please excuse some grammatical mistakes – English is not my first language😉